Quitting Vs. Stopping

Quitting vs. Stopping…

This topic always makes me cringe. The idea of quitting my passions forever… Shifting away from one passion and closing the door, to focus on another… It sucks, it’s hard, and sometimes, arguably every time, it is necessary. Quitting, by definition, implies that “usually” you end something, or relinquish something permanently. Key word being usually… This is why comeback stories are such a huge deal. Take for example, boxers. These tough dudes train their whole lives to fight. And sometimes, once a boxer has quit his sport and moved on with his/her life, they cannot take the absence of the fight. 5 years pass… 10 years pass… Alright coach, I am ready to play again! The comeback kid! It is rare to quit something and walk away with intention, just to find yourself  to do it again (except bad habits, those die hard with us;). Quitting is a very abrupt change.

So what happens when we stop?


Above is a painting titled, “Naples” I had just finished massage school, and it had been quite a few months since I had last painted. I had stopped painting, I had chosen to focus on my studies and I was going to school from 9am to 10:30 pm, making up hours like a bad kid and doubling my education in the process. All i could think was anatomy and massage. My focus and energy was being exerted towards something incredibly rewarding, and I did not feel the loss of my passion for art. I knew I would return some day.

“Naples” got its inspiration from my trip to Florida shortly after graduation from school. My father and I decided to track down Taqueria San Julien, a hidden gem on the outskirts of Naples. This would be our third day in a row getting tacos from this place. Google it, I never lie about tacos… Haha, well, after we got our fill, we decided to head into the heart of Naples, and he took me to a bakery for coffee and a fancy brunch meal. Eggs Benedict with salmon.. It’s hard to forget the food I had consumed this day… This entire trip honestly. Everything was SO GOOD! My father wanted to take me to see an artist he found last time he was in Naples, so we set off down the boardwalk. The walk was phenomenal! Getting to talk with the locals and observe the strange inhabitants of the trees, plant and animal alike. And as if emerging out of thin air…

It was a small little place… You could walk right by it and not even know. I present to you, the incredible works of Emily James!


She was in her office space working that day. She was messing around with some acrylic pour stuff and doing abstract ocean work with her hands, it was whimsically lovely. I would love to see what she has been up to since I last saw. Her work is moving, breathtaking, inspiring… She gave me permission to take photos of her work, and so I set off absorbing her works, learning and studying. She loved it, and we shared experiences of past works. We hung out with Emily for a couple of hours, and it was a moment in time that is timeless and a flash all at the same time.  I am so inspired when I see what she sees. 20171031_112124

Her work is fascinating and deep. Simple and beautiful. Powerful and mysterious. I had never been moved to react to art as quickly as I did until I walked into her studio and saw her works. And then I truly met her.

Emily James… A person who mentored me in the briefest of moments, but life-lasting eternal. Saw through my being and spoke to my soul. “Never stop painting” still echoes throughout the chambers of my body. Her eyes weren’t looking at my eyes,  they were looking through them. The connection was ancient. Primitive and good. Whole and wise. Courageous. Unforgettable.

That moment was so impactful, I remember turning around and asking myself if that was real just then. I was transported to a woman’s mind, heart, and soul. And she took care of me in the process. Gives me goosepimples…! 20171031_111112-rotated.jpg

The same day we land, I get to work and I begin painting. And what comes out? A piece that had been inspired by one of her own.  I never took a photo of it, but I do remember chuckling when the piece emerged with the block-y brush strokes. Emily had created a weaved (woven? woved.)/torn canvas piece, that reflected an abstract checkers board. Textures and colors were everything about the piece. The title “Naples” came around later once I reflected upon the memories and relived the laughs. What a dear treasured memory to have being expressed through a piece of art.


Thank you Emily for you continued inspirations!! You are loved greatly!



Transformation Manifestations

Hello there!

Something I want to be better at is writing in my blog. I want to make sure that my thoughts are being expressed clearly, and that there is good information here for my supporters to dig into. Love you all so much, thank you for taking time to hang out with me.

Well, let’s dive into it because transformations aren’t really the shyest of creatures, and yet, they are…

Some day, I am going to learn how to talk to you. Haha, I laugh at this because what I mean to say there’s a fine balance between stream of consciousness, which draws a certain audience in, and methodical writing, or structured writing that takes edits and processes and more edits, read-throughs… And see, this is the point where the mind has a choice to wander. Do I talk about stream of consciousness or do I talk about the more structured writing techniques. Either one will lead me down a path, and the third and fourth options are, talk about both, or talk about neither. And if you have stuck with me up to this point, bravo. It is getting complicated. Especially the things I am not able to depict to you without turning this into a book. And what I am talking about is how do I talk to you exactly to bring the most efficient audience for my work. Phew, made it to the point of that one. Let’s see if I can figure out why I wanted to bring this up. Holy cow… And that was just deciding on which way to talk to you, I didn’t even get into how each one would affect my audience. The details can go so deep. But why? Why do our brains think this way? And you know… I am realizing that I am not going to answer this question in this entry. Hah! Such a silly brain. I want to focus on transformations. The butterfly cannot see that it is a butterfly, but others sure do appreciate its beauty.

We are talking about transformations here,  ladies and gentlemen! The shedding that keeps us alive. Metamorphosis. Let me ask you something to reflect on. If you never transformed in your life. If you never shed, or grew, or learned. Would you be alive? Would your inner-spirit? Why is it necessary for transformations?

Transformations have no rules. There’s no rule with how to talk to my audience. I would say that a good practice would be along the lines of a professional one, a respectful one. I am not going to mistreat my audience and call them bitches. I could, and then who knows, now I am drawing a new audience. There are no rules how to talk to an audience.  And I have the power to transform my audience into something else. Fans. Hell, Bandaids even. I am presenting myself. Authentically. Awkwardly. That paragraph up there, wondering how I need to talk to you… What if I told you, this is how I think. For true. Scattered, nonsense. And in this moment of accepting it and leaving those words as they are, I am presenting my vulnerable self. Anxiety Nico would be editing and editing. They can’t hear my insecurities. My worries. And then I can literally transition into space rockets. To transform the ambiance of the entry? Sure, why not. let’s talk about space rockets.

Only because now you’re thinking of space rockets. Can you believe we have those damn things landing back safely on their own? It blows me away, no pun intended. Well kinda,intended… I did write it out. and kept it, right?? I hope to head up to mars one day in one of those rockets. the Moon, Mars, Jupiter… light speed in our lifetime? nah…Just crazy space rockets for now… And the words I am writing right now don’t have to truly mean everything,  granted, words are powerful, and you want to use them as efficiently as possible. So what are my words doing? They are powerful. And they are coming from a place of perceived truths. They guide. They help transform black and white lettering into colorful images in the consciousness of my oh so wonderful audience that has stuck through this entry. Love you guys!

Brains transform. Antlers shed. Caterpillars are now butterflys. Watching the season transform from winter to spring, and the new life it brings is so magical. The shedding of the old one. It is happening everywhere, naturally, 24/7. We as humans get incredible opportunities to experience our own transformations, we get to be there for others when they go through theirs, and we get to talk to people about it and share. We get to observe Mother Earth as she goes through her own. Snakes and spiders have their own creepy way of shedding, and we love watching it. There is not a time limit with how long a transformation will occur. Sometimes it takes a series of mini ones before the ultimate transformation can take place. Sometimes, they are pretty scheduled. We cannot stop transformations, as this entire universe is constantly shifting and moving. This painting used to be a psychedelic dripping neon cat. It is now a stratosphere in my heart. A true space cat losing its mind on LSD.  Say hello to “Stratosphere” an 11X14 abstract piece painted in 2017

“Stratosphere” seems to bring a sense of peace over me. That no matter what the situation is, I can always breathe, and start over, even if my canvas isn’t blank. Begin painting and paint myself a new scene. A new life. Transformations are scary because they leave behind something, but that something is only something that can’t be seen by others. Deep down, I can find my old self. I can find what I lost, if I wanted it back. I can manifest what I want when I am ready for it, and I can peel my layers as deep as I want. Whenever Iwant.  Transformations are also tricky because they indicate that what once helped me in the past, maybe a vice, may not be really help me in my present or future.

I am learning to trust my heart and my gut and searching for ways my intuition and intellect balance again.

until next time,





Flow: The Directional Path


Well, I want to take a second to paint a picture of some passion topics in my life. Flow is a very universal term, but you may have yet to come across it. You’re welcome! Flow, or flow-state is a state of mental capacity where time begins to lose its meaning or fail to exist, and the efficiency or flow of your movement and intention and focus are improved drastically. It’s the work flow, the play flow, the flow flow! And you very well have been searching for a way to tap into your flow. Flow… Flow flow.. Flow. Flow.

What if I told you that you have a subconscious flow and conscious flow. Some neuroscientists may even say this is what’s known as Macro and Micro Flow. Larger, more conscious efforts of Flow, and then the micro more subconscious areas of flow. Work would be a great example:

Let’s say you are a computer image-er and you have to evaluate, process, repair, process and image an OS onto a each and every single one of the 75 orders you got that day. Alright, game face time! 75 computers, and you manage to do all of this in an 8 hour shift before you go home. Macro flow would say focus on time management and how efficient you were physically with your time, ie: your fingers being used as finite tools to help unscrew and screw parts back together, or how accurate your tool is. Micro flow is more focused on the thoughts, data, and subconscious flow. Time management is also present here, but on a deeper level, to a point where time doesn’t exist, you just know how and when something has been imaged, or how long the OS took to install.

Sound crazy yet?

What if flow was a directional path. The easier you get in flow the more you know where you are heading. insight? Foresight?

I am not sure, but one could argue that it very well could be a directional path for you and your subconscious brain. If dance is where you find your flow, won’t you want to do it more? Won’t you want to hone your skill and discover the many elements of dance? Well, I think so. I think that when I discovered Fire Poi, I discovered my Flow Path to a better life, a healthier, happier life.

I began listening to my creative. I found music, and painting, and writing, and photography, massage even! I found these artistically creative aspects of life, and implemented them into my own. And now, I don’t find a day when I am not happy I have made the choices I have made, especially about my creative.

I want to leave this topic open for others. I think this is a great topic for creative aspects of life in general. Where have you found your flow-state? What did it feel like?

Another interesting topic, is there such a thing as right and wrong in a flow state? would the mind be able to know the difference?

I think it would. The mind is quick, that’s why a flow state even occurs. The mind is quick. In a flow state, would it even ALLOW you to make a wrong decision? bad decision? Immoral? I am not quite sure what the word I’m looking for is, but it is fascinating to think at just how much we let go when the flow-state has been activated, and how much we trust in ourselves to make the best of our flow-state time and focus.


*The painting depicted is “Every Which Way, Green Foreplay.” Created in 2016, the wooden frame that you see painted on was being decided on around this time. This painting was one of the reasons why I decided to make the frame my signature. I find flow in this piece. I see physical movement, and peace, and serene. I think this piece depicts My Directional Flow Path the best.



Jumping Into The Abyss

As I sat here, frantically typing and retyping words that I thought would demonstrate this idea, I was reminded of something simple. Unzip.


I cannot really say why. Only. Unzip.


I have recently decided to focus on my art full time. That and my private practice where I can take my tools and my products along with me wherever I may end up and make money as I move along life. I am paving a different course than what I thought was necessary. And yet, it is necessary.

Jumping into the Abyss is an intriguing thought to say the least. Jumping aimlessly into the depth of a dark-ness, pit-less place. Is it uncertain, unknown that we have to describe it as something so dark and dreary? It makes me laugh. Phew, I get goosebumps just thinking about what I have decided to do, a full time artist. 20190216_175051

“Starman” 16X20, 2017


I am ready to share with the world what I can create. I am ready. Here I am, jumping into the Abyss. *sound effect – droop* It feels insane. It feels crushing. I tear up every time I think about it. A full time artist. That’s me! A happy Nico creating all he wants. Damn straight that’s what I want! I want that. Yes, please!

The road does not end with this big decision. It is not like you can flip a switch and say alright, now I am fully financially, emotionally, physically, spiritually capable of doing this. It takes time and nurturing. It takes reflection and patience, and intuition and love. And it also takes a crap ton of hard work. That would be funnier if I was a farmer…

So, I am also awful at jokes. 🙂

What I am trying to say in this dramatically funny way around it all is, I am so nervous. I see the quality and talent of my work. I know I can sell my work, and it will mostly come from the work itself. But that means hard work. Hard diligent disciplined work is afoot. This is what I want, so let’s do it!



The Beginnings of something Unknown:

How to even begin this… It was years ago when I first started figuring out that Painting was what I wanted to do. I messed around with stuff in my friend’s basement way back in 2013. No idea what I was doing whatsoever, I soon found that I was self-teaching myself about art and what it meant to be an artist. It intrigued me so much! What spoke to me was that I had to do more, I had to find more, I had to be more… And so I did. I pursued the realm of art, and was confused. What I was walking into that every artist walks into is the struggle of being an artist. It had nothing to do with a specific medium of art, yet, it did at the same time. It didn’t matter that I was painting. I could have just as well as explored photography, music, writing, and the struggle of finding myself as an artist would remain the same. So what does an artist struggle with?

For one, style, right? Style is major for any artist, even if you are starting out, creating for fun, an enthusiast, or moving into art as a career.  Style is what is unique to the artist, not just the art that is being created. Because competition is a natural component of sales, competition becomes a factor Yet, it was all too similar. Like layers, I found myself associating these different aspects of my life, and integrating them into what I call “Flow Art.” The art of Dance and music, expression, abstract and structure… It all blends, and I had no idea what I was discovering. But I knew I had fallen in love. I am still learning to this day about how deep art takes me. There are limits within structure, but the structure I apply (frames) is limitless. The amount of color options are limited, yet, through dance and expression, there is limitless emotional connection. It is deep, this thing I have found. And I am along for the ride through the unknown, having a blast!

My first painting ever Sold!

It is hard to express the feeling you receive when the hard work you put into creating a product of your heart actually gets some sort of appreciation. Enough appreciation that someone else is willing to buy your work, that is. But with that being said, the feeling is awesome! I spent a few minutes taking photos with this piece, “Twister.” Looking back at these photos, I just laugh. I documented the raw emotions, playing around with the photos as if we were on a date, or some sort of emotional separation. Hah! This piece was special to begin with. It is what I consider an original. Not in style, or because there are no prints, but because this was one of the firsts I ever created with intention to sell. I painted this piece nearly three years ago, in 2015. It was then, when I started exploring how to frame my pieces, and if I should continue framing them. There is history tied to this piece, and it rests in a happy home as far as I know. What a cool feeling.

My world of Art, and where I come From.

Where do I come from? To play this game on a Universal level, well, I come from you. And you, and you, and that tree, and over there, look, a dinosaur! I exist, just as you do because of the history tied to this beautiful place. And because I am you, and you are me, is the art that I create just an extension of you? I guess what you are wondering is: Where did I grow up? Where did I find art…? Who is Nico Miller?

I was born in a little city known as Cottonwood, UT. But that was where the hospital existed, and crazily enough, the doctor that monitored and assisted still practices there at that hospital, some 30 years later.

I grew up in a quiet little dead end neighborhood, protected by a farm in my backyard, and old, retired people in the front yard. Not literally protected with linked arms and pitchforks… No… There weren’t many kids is what I mean… Sagehill Dr. I will never forget that address. I shouldn’t say never because who knows… Alzheimer’s, am I right? To get back on track, this little quaint place had

The Floating Frame Project

Framing art pieces is one challenge any viewer faces. From shadow-boxing to exquisite wooden, metal, or glass frames. And these frames guide our eyes to better focus on what the artist is trying to depict. From my standpoint, I want to frame my pieces to help guide that eye from the get-go. Granted, I fully support getting an additional frame for protection, or viewing pleasure. It isn’t always easy, making the decision for the viewer. In a way, I force the viewer to look at my pieces the way I want them to. It’s strange, to put my own interpretation of a frame on a piece, and hope that the viewer is open to the idea that the frame itself is art. Painted on, unique, and expressive. There is a direct link between how the frame works with the piece because the piece draws out inspiration for the frame. Quite interesting indeed from my perspective. How do you, the viewer, view my frames? What a fun game!

Finger painting is not just for Kids

I got the itch to finger paint one evening. I could not explain it, I just… wanted to. I wanted to know what the paint felt like as I squeezed it through my fingers, I wanted to know how painting felt without a foreign object in my hand.

Interestingly, I fought this. “You’ll make a mess… You don’t want to clean up a mess… It is just going to feel weird…” Yet, the curiosity was overwhelming. It felt as if I was a kid. Hell, I am a kid at heart, and even more so when I paint.

I didn’t put on gloves. I didn’t prepare for the mess. I dove in, all 10 digits at once, and what an experience! Swiping my fingers back and forth, swaying to the music; dancing my fingers off. My fingers were dancing across the canvas! It was absolutely beautiful watching what I was creating. Creating beautiful images of abstract color and then wiping them away felt pretty cool, very temporary. Learning how to use my fingers as brush tools was even more fun.

Breaking away from the all-out-kid-attitude, I began studying how I can utilize these new found tools. What a trip! My mind found a way to explore creativity, and there wasn’t a foreign object between me and the canvas. It was direct contact. The mind. The hand. The canvas.

This was my first finger painting experience. I do not think I have learned much about how to properly prepare for the clean up. I am still a kid when it comes to that… Holy cow! Yet, the concept of finger painting has evolved. I have discovered a way to express my heart and my art in a different way. Basic and primitive, yet fun and creative. It is strange to think that my ancestors were doing exactly what I am doing, but maybe without the mentality or approach that I have. Art is constantly evolving, and yet, we find ways to go back to our roots. This is important for art, and artists alike. We were artists before the concept even existed. So what does this tell you? Do we continue on this path of evolutionary artistic creation by going back to our roots? Is it impossible to ignore our roots? Subconsciously, I would argue that it is damn near impossible to ignore our roots. Innate creatures of habit.

Sure, I may have stumbled onto something new to me. Finger painting… hah! Who would have guessed it is what I would be doing? Maybe some of you think this is a no-brainer. But along my journey of artist creativity, not I. This was a discovery! A discovery of something ancient.

The title of this piece is “Mushroom Fairy.” Painted in 2015, this piece is absolutely one I am more connected to. Maybe it is actually because I used my fingers, and I eliminated the foreign tool.